A Welcome From Sir Stanley

My only virtue is my humility, but I have it in such abundance

that it makes me superior in almost every way.
Source Unknown

Welcome dear visitors to our humble endeavor! Make yourselves at home and please let me know if I can direct Patty to make your time here more cozy and comfortable.

I still marvel at the little world of kink Patty and I have eked out for ourselves. To say I stumbled into BDSM implies a journey of some kind, but the simple truth of the matter is that kink totally found me.

While everybody who sails the BDSM waters took different paths to get there, I've noticed from my own research a common theme for a lot of people at the beginning of their journey. Typically, it begins with a desire to discover and give freedom to a somewhat dark and deep yearning from within. It's rather isolating and frightening to the individual because those desires are contrary to what they thought was "normal." Ultimately, they come upon the world of BDSM and their horizons broaden far and wide. With joy and relief, they discover that others share in their twisted and darkest desires ... they are not alone. The realization of a new "normal" is both invigorating and liberating.

That tale of discovery, however, is not my story. While I had feelings of isolation, self-doubt and fear, they did not precede my journey here.  Instead, those feelings swept over me like a flood the moment I dipped my toe into these waters. That's because when Patty and I decided to let our BSDM freak fly as an occasional spice to an otherwise fulfilling "vanilla" relationship, I sought out the great Google god to help me learn how to become the best Master / Dom I could be. Quickly my enthusiasm transgressed into overwhelming confusion and sheer frustration.

The problem wasn't due to a lack of information ... quite the contrary. It just seemed that most of what I found wasn't relevant to me as a new, and budding part-time Dom. The vast majority of resources available on the internet, in a book store, or at my local library was written by people for whom BDSM represents a 24/7 existence that was cultivated over many, many years. To me, I felt adrift on an ocean of answers to questions I wasn't asking. While I've since blazed my own trails through the BDSM wilderness, I distinctly remember how isolated and lonely it felt at the beginning.

It's that very gulf of disconnect I hope to bridge with this blog so that other part-timers who are indulging in some kinky waters may find a sense relevance and belonging in their aspirations to include a chunk of kink within their "vanilla" existence. You'll indeed find answers here, but very likely you'll discover even more questions we've not yet thought to ponder.  Hopefully, we can shed some light for each other, together ... kink willing.

Welcome!

Stanley